I'll just give ya a little about this Fan-Fic. Basically its told by Touma in a letter to Seiji, its a song fic (yeah my first ever!), kinda yaoi, but then again nothing really happens. Its dark has some bad language....And remember I'm not a very good writer....So don't be to mean

Well then on with the story!


_______________________

"The Best I ever Had" (song fic)
By: Aoki
Song By: Vertical Horizon
Post:yeah if you actually like it that much ^.^;;;
Disclaimer: Of course I don't own YST (sunrise Ink. Does) or the song
(its owned by Vertical Horizon, and anyone else who has a claim to
it). This is strictly for fan proposes, nothing more nothing less k
^.^

*~~~~*~~~~*
So you sailed away
into a gray sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring
*~~~~*~~~~*

Seiji -

I watched has you went away that day. Into the gray drizzly morning, leaving me here all by myself. Lonely, in this apartment we use to share. We use to love each others presence. What happened?

That fight on the last day we had was the first, and the worst. I admit it was my fault, to bad I didn't admit it then. We could still be sharing the moments of friendship, love, and just being together. Being has thick head and stubborn has I was, I didn't realize how
much it would hurt you.

*~~~~*~~~~*
Nothings quite the same now
I just say your name now
*~~~~*~~~~*

Seiji...
God, you don't know how lonely I am here without you. I sit in complete darkness, hoping for some kind of phone call or any kind of contact from you. I think I'm over you, but then again, your friendship meant so much to me I can't even cop with what happened.

*~~~~*~~~~*
But its not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I ever had
*~~~~*~~~~*

Its not that bad. I'll eventually get over you, I know that's a fact, but I don't think I'll ever be able to forget what we had going on. It was magical, like a dream, or a fairy tale. Like a dream it had to came to an end, unlike a fairy tale, it wasn't so happily ever after. More like lonely ever after.

It began has a fair tale, though, you were my best friend, and then lovers. When we started living together I thought there was nothing that could ever bring us apart. I was wrong, so wrong. I don't remember what I was thinking that day. You more then likely never want to see me again. It was stupid and unthoughtful of me.

I ruined the best thing I ever had.

*~~~~*~~~~*
So you stole my world
Now I'm just a phony
Remembering the girl
Leaves me down and lonely
*~~~~*~~~~*

Seiji, you were my world, my hole entire life. Everything I did it revolved around you in some way. I don't have anyone to please, no one but myself. I don't deserve any kind of pleasure from anyone, even myself.

I look in the mirror and see my pitiful looking pale face, and unwashed blue hair. I swear I haven't see the sunlight since you left. Seeing the sun makes me think of you. When I think of you that makes me feel so mad, and stupid. I get depressed, and I feel like no one will ever love me like you did ever again.

*~~~~*~~~~*
Send it in a letter
Make yourself feel better
*~~~~*~~~~*

I want a letter from you. Anything at all. Its been over two months since you left, without a signal word. I wouldn't care if the letter was about how much you hate me, has long has you write me something, anything at all.

Just to know your okay, will make my days better, even if you think I'm a total bitch.

*~~~~*~~~~*
But its not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't need me back
You're just the best I ever had
*~~~~*~~~~*

You probably found someone new by now. You were always so quick in getting what you wanted. You probably have no more thoughts of me anymore, unless there ones of anger, and hatred. I can understand that. I hope your happy, you deserve it, I don't.

*~~~~*~~~~*
And it may take some time to
Patch me up inside
But I can't take it so I
Run away and hide
And I may find in time that
You were always right
You're always right
*~~~~*~~~~*

God, I don't know how long I can go on like this. I hide in the darkness inside this small apartment wasting away trying to heal my mental wounds. I curl up on the bed that we shared crying my self to sleep sometimes. I drink at least two packs of beer a day. I'm a
walking zombie, and no one cares, who would?

You were right when you called me a self centered slut. Your always right. I don't deserve to live. I'm only causing pain. I see no hope for me in the future only dark loneliness.

*~~~~*~~~~*
So you sailed away
into a gray sky morning
Now I'm here to stay
Love can be so boring
*~~~~*~~~~*

You left me, that day, and all I did was stare I guess I'm going to be here for a long time. I don't like showing my face in public to often. I feel like everyone is staring and laughing at me. Heh I guess its kind of like paranoia. I just can't take it anymore....Seiji.

All I feel towers myself is hate. Hate for everything I've ever done, mainly hurting you. I just want to say I'm so sorry. One day you'll forgive me, but I don't know if I can ever forgive my self.

*~~~~*~~~~*
What was it you wanted
Could it be I'm haunted
*~~~~*~~~~*

Bye Seiji, maybe one day you'll be able to read this letter. I would send it to you, but I have no address...nothing at all. Maybe if I had some kind of address we could have worked this out somehow. Thing never work out has you plan. I found that out the hard way.

I'm to haunted in this world, to live any more. Everything I see reminds me of you. I can't take it any more damnit. The world doesn't need a person like me, they need more people like you, Seiji, kind, honest, and sincere.

*~~~~*~~~~*
But its not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
I don't want you back
You're just the best I ever had
The best I ever had
The best I ever...
*~~~~*~~~~*

I just want you to know, you were the best thing I ever had, I'll never forget that. One day we will reunite, but not here, in a different time, different place. I'm sure it will work out better
then. Although History has a way of repeating its self.

Love Forever,
Touma


__________________

The end! I hope it wasn't to bad, or confusing. Questions, comments? please?
Ja
Aoki
http://www.geocities.com/ronindimensions
(soon to be a domain!)